chelan rene’ russ

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Archive for the category “God is teaching me…”

Believe the Best

You know, you can believe the best about others…and not have high expectations. It is a way to love them. Love believes the best. That people can achieve amazing things, make great decisions, follow through.

When they let you down, you have a choice to make: give them grace, or be offended and let that offense sit in your heart.

CHOICE A: If you choose grace, you will notice something intriguing. Other people will usually give you grace when you  mess up. You have a free sense about you. You allow yourself to move on and focus on other things ~ serving others, or on how God has been so gracious and merciful to you and your family, or on ways you can make your day fulfilling and productive and joyful.

CHOICE B: If you choose to be offended, you will notice something, too. The offense will not be content with sitting there grumbling under its breath, “I’m offended”. It will grow like a saturated demon-possessed sea monkey. It will obsess, it will growl, it will rob.  It will nag you with all your perceived entitlements.  It will blind you to that person’s unique and delightful qualities.  It will not relent, but will wait with long suffering until their next offensive move. Then still unsatisfied, will boast with a hundred “I KNEW IT”s that will not quench nor satisfy for long. It will divert your attention from the good in others…and worse, the good in God. It will lie and tell you abstract, distorted generalizations about groups of people. Lies about children or women or men or the church or married life or people who grow up a certain way you did not.

Even when it is SO difficult to do, do it. When it seems you have much to lose, do not believe it. The only time you lose is when you harbor offense.

Instead, risk it. Pray for help, and love people in a way that Paul told the Corinthians to love. In an unassuming, forgiving way that is unnatural to do over and over and over, but is rewarding ten times over:

Choose to believe the best.

My Dream

On August 25th, I woke up from a dream – one that was still clear in my mind. A week or so before, I’d prayed that God give me a dream – one that would be easy to understand.

In the dream, I was visiting a Bible college to hear Louis Palau speak. After his sermon, there was great worship & I was caught up in the Spirit…lost in the moment. As I was leaving the sancuary, a long time friend of mine, Beth, approached me and said, “I have to ask you something. Do you know a Frank?” I replied Yes. And she said, “I feel like God wants me to tell you that his health is failing and that he wants to forgive.”

As I made my way to the lobby and sat in a comfy chair, a young teen Asian girl behind me I realized lost a necklace pendant. She had dropped it on the floor and was looking for it & others were helping her. I heard them searching and heard the word “wicca” as she was trying to describe it.  She found & snatched it up, and as she was standing back up with it held tightly in her hand, she looked me straight in the eye with intent.

She quickly, almost forcefully extended that hand with the satanic pendant in it toward me, but still held it tight. I knew she was trying to put some kind of hex or curse on me. I tried to speak, “I WILL NOT be cursed. I will be BLESSED in Jesus’ name.” But my mouth would not open. It felt glued shut. She did it a second time & I tried a second time to say those words in response. But got the same result. She “threw” it toward me a third time and frustrated as I’ll get out, I tried a third time & this time, my mouth was opened wide and my words came out clear as a bell.

“I WILL NOT be cursed. I will be BLESSED in Jesus’ name!”

 

…and I woke up.

 

A Word

At the end of January, I went to a conference where an acquaintance came up to me and gave me a word from the Lord. It was in the middle of an extremely loud part of worship for youth, and I was doing just that – worshiping like there was no tomorrow. She had to literally yell into my ear. I thought she was going to tell me I was being distracting, so it was a relief to hear her say that she wanted me to know she feels really strongly that God wants to tell me that he knows my heart, and he is proud of me. To remember that I am his, an heir of his; and I have access to all he has for me. So whatever it is I need from him…

ask.

I had to approach her in a quieter setting later to see if I heard her right, and I did. I believe this word. But I often times forget that I have an all access status with my Father, the King. And that when I come to him with a right heart, he is not shaking his head in judgment of me, saying under his breath, “not her again. what’s she want now… a new day, a new request”. He is not.

He is not that kind of father. He is not that kind of King

He desires me to love him; to surrender everything

And when I walk up to his throne, if timid or courageous

He sees my heart, its motives bare…on scribbled journal pages

Unlike any father who has ever loved his child

Never disappointed, taken back by choices wild

His arms will never tire of the reaching they must do

For I am his beloved, and it is I, he will pursue

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tonight, a friend told me that she had a scripture for me, and I cannot help but see similarities to that Word given to me in January. It is from Psalm 41.

1 Blessed are those who have regard for the weak;
the LORD delivers them in times of trouble.
2 The LORD protects and preserves them—
they are counted among the blessed in the land

11 I know that you are pleased with me,
for my enemy does not triumph over me.
12 Because of my integrity you uphold me
and set me in your presence forever.

13 Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel,
from everlasting to everlasting.

 

Amen.

I know that it is only by the grace of my Father that I can even claim to have integrity. It is by his pure Holy Spirit that washes me and whispers to me daily. How I praise Him.

 

Feb.22nd: Advancing the Kingdom & the Push Back You Get

I will start this post by saying that today was a very good day. I picked up my friend who has survived a great deal of trauma Read more…

Justice Conference 2011

Last weekend I had such an amazing time at the Justice Conference in central Oregon (The Riverhouse Hotel and Conference Center in Bend). I keep using the word amazing. But it was a little bit of that, mixed with inspiring, with educational, with exciting, with fun, with entertaining, with exhausting, with spiritually uplifting, with empowering!

I sincerely hope that those who volunteered and those who organized it (World Relief and Kilns College) make it an annual event.

I’ve been a bit busy, and writing about the two day event would take up hours for me! But I want to document something here, something to remind me of all I was blessed to take in. So to capture many of my own memories and some much better quality photos than I took, I found one of the speakers’ blogs ~ here are a few of  Ken’s posts on last weekend’s Justice Conference:

I learned so much, and am so grateful to God for my experience that I got to share with my fellow SCTNow friend and volunteer, Ms. Mary Dirksen…not to mention how the Director of (Mary Nguyen) and interns at Not For Sale – Oregon let me crash with them both nights in their cozy Sun River abode.

Check out this other video put together by the J.C. organizers: http://vimeo.com/20094845

This event just made my passion for justice, specifically in the church and lived out in my personal life {DAY to DAY} burn brighter than ever!  No longer closing my eyes and ears to anyone who is hurting immensely. I will listen. I will notice. I will care. And I will do my very best to do what I can to respond. I want to do what God calls me to so that love and justice prevail in my life and Jesus may be seen a little bit more, here on earth.

…And saving the best little nugget for last in my post, below is the stunning, dead-on prayer written and then spoken at the beginning of the conference by Mr. Ken Wytsma:

God – lead us this weekend to hear the cry of the vulnerable and oppressed
Lead us to care for the weak and needy
Lead us to see others as brothers and sisters
Help us appreciate goodness, to love simply and not hide hypocrisy with rhetoric

Let us embrace justice and mercy
Grant us humility
Supply us with enough faith to give our lives away
And bless us with strength when we grow weary

LORD, let the knowledge of your love;
Fuel our commitment
Inform our passions
Stir our gratitude
And help us transform the world

For you and your Glory – Amen.

 

Eph.6, in Hi-Def

I started this new category of documenting spiritual attacks in relation to ministry efforts because I’ve noticed in the last year – a direct correlation between the two. I want to be better prepared and learn more about how our efforts here on earth affect spirits. Read more…

Letting Scripture Sink In

Today, I actually got up before Angel and made my coffee and sat down with my trusty NLT Bible and journal. Didn’t get to the journaling part though. Next time, I will not have my laptop open in front of me. I read from Hosea.

This is a sort of format I’ll use to help remember what I read and let it sink in:

S (scripture) ~

Hosea 1:14-23 – 2:1-4

O (observation) ~

God has feelings of abandonment when we idolize things or people, above him. He hurts. He grieves. He longs for closeness even when we say we are committed to him but our actions show otherwise. This really means we are all adulterers at some point. He takes this seriously. But he has a pull toward us, for we are HIS. We are his beautiful bride, and he is patient with us as we find our way back to him. He has done nothing to deserve mistrust. Yet we struggle to trust him every day.

A (application) ~

I can always trust Him, and when I have trusted in a man or in things to provide for me and make me “happy”, I need to simply go back to him and with humility say to him – I was wrong. I want to trust you again. Help me when I’m weak!

I can choose to prioritize my God above other people or duties in my life. When I do this, those people, relationships and duties come to life with purpose, they thrive and grow and give glory to God. When I don’t submit them to God as head of my life, they suck energy out of me, creating stress and anxiety and a false sense of security.

P (prayer) ~

Lord Jesus, I’m sorry I don’t trust you more. You are so worthy. Help me to prioritize you first in my life – even in my day. I’ll take it day by day and lean on you. You have never let me down. Thank you for bringing peace and organization into my life of chaos and worry. You are my Prince of Peace and I am your princess!

~ Christmas Time 2010 ~

This Christmas was different than the last 3 years. Different-eR. It was special because of quite a few things. This is our first Christmas, living in the Portland area, since 2002…the year Braylon was born.

No travel plans to make for us – only the ones made for my incredible in-laws to join us at the home we just moved into. This place amazes me…and the fact that God, in his grace, made it possible for us to rent it and share it with many family members this week. It is humbling, sometimes surreal. The fact that He made this possible and has blessed Ricky’s business as much as He has since July, just makes me shake my head & smile with satisfaction. Yes, he loves me that much. He promises that if we delight ourselves in Him, he will give us the desires of our heart (~Ps. 37:4). We have… and He has. Room for the kids to run and play, an open white & cheery kitchen, a garage, a neighborhood with friendly people and park close by, a backyard, all appliances,  and owners that are incredibly easy to work with and talk to. These are just a few of those desires of my heart, which He has given.

Glory to God, always faithful to His word.

C H R I S T M A S 2010

Before I forget, here are some details of our December.

Music Scene: The 12th, I got to sing several songs at Horizon Community’s annual concert. This year, they were What Child is This, Go Tell It (a duet with the beautiful Brooklynne Levasa) and I Believe, the finale, which was originally sung by my favorite blues musician of all time, Mr. Jonny Lang.  On the 17th, I sang at a cute modern cafe called ‘Cloud 7′ in the Pearl. Two songs: O Come, O Come Emmanuel (blues style) and Silent Night (a capella style) w/a great, young performer, Ms. Sarah Billings & her extremely talented band, complete w/keys, guitar, drums, bass, & even a sweet sax player. SO fun. My family all came and supported me, even for just two songs. What a great night.

The Move: The next day, we finished painting in the new place on Morgan Ct., & we MOVED! Fresh colors on the walls and our own things inside this house really made it seem like home almost straight away. My mom was so helpful! Providing labor (painting the bedrooms), hugs, housewarming gifts and coffee as needed…all week long.

The next day, I was singing again at church; this time blessed by Pastor Kenny who gave me the opportunity to do my bluesy Christmas song, “This Jesus”, a personal one I wrote last year in Texas, about how even though miracles happened more frequently around the time of Christ’s birth, we can still pray for & expect them, even now.

Family Together: On the 20th, I just ran around town and did some last minute shopping for food and a few small gifts. The Pilands flew into PDX that night…and Ricky let Braylon stay up and go with him to pick them up, even w/an 11:15pm arrival.  He said when Braylon saw Gamma at the gate, he ran full steam ahead toward her, jumped up on her in a huge hug with all limbs hanging on, nearly knocking her over! I guess he missed her. :) It’d been since May or June. Too long. But not as long as Kim had gone without seeing them…14 months. Way, WAY too long!  Kim, Clint, Aaron & Ali made the 7-hr drive (but it really took about 9 due to central WA snow) to visit & stay w/us. All 4 of ‘em piled into Angel’s room. It may be a little close for comfort, but it works!

On the 23rd, the 8 of us along with Jeremy, Jamie, Riley & Tyler all gathered and talked and laughed and ate a delicious meal together, then opened gifts and then indulged in some sweets, played a game, talked more, & just enjoyed each other’s company. I was concerned about providing & preparing the food for so many, but we all chipped in and helped. Janis and her meal-plan she devised with me saved the week from stress. It’s actually been fun to make meals.

~~~~~~~~

My Side of the Fam:  Christmas Eve was spent with my parents and sister’s family, as was Christmas morning (at Charity’s home)…LOTS of fun. I just LOVE them!

As much as we tried to go away from a big ‘ol load of gifts, you can only not-contribute so much – and then when you’re at family members’ homes, you just gotta do what they’re all doing, I guess. Not that gift-giving is wrong or bad. I love giving. I think we just want to move away from spending and focusing on the monetary gifts. Our goal as we’ve been more convicted lately, is to focus a bit more each year, on worship and Jesus and giving to people outside our lil family…like to those who have serious needs. This is what the Lord has been speaking to us. We will be able o use it as a more true teaching moment for our kids and help them to keep their perspective in the right place so that when they have kids, they can learn and celebrate the true meaning of this season, much more than generations past.  Rick & I think that if we all did these things (give more but spend less, serve more as a family, & engage in full worship together, during the Christmas season, it would glorify Jesus more, as he is worthy to be praised. We want to do that in the future. As I type this even now, a Pandora commercial came on for Compassion International suggesting to give a gift of a chicken to a family who needs the eggs. “Go to www.compassion.gifts.com“. That’s one thing – one example of what I mean. I love that idea!

Back to the Bebb home get-together…we had a blast and enjoyed our time, ate roast beef – which my mom did perfectly! My mashed potatoes, KFC’s gravy, fruit-,spring- and jello-salads, and more. It was different and delectable.  This morning’s feast was traditional for the Bebb’s (@ the Stewarts) including her famous Santa Pancakes (pics to come), hammy eggs, bacon, sausage & a gorgeously gooey monkey-bread masterpiece inside her glass covered cake-dish. Drool – on – keyboard…wiping up now.

It has been amazing to spend so much of the last week or so with so many loved ones – that physical element and proximity make such a difference. The hugs and kisses and games and tickles and photos taken and cooking together and eye contact – these things are all so special. Simply special. They are reminders to me of how good our God is.

That was about it.

I will write later about how we told Angel that Santa’s ’misfit’ elf, Hermie, came down our chimney and left us a loaf of wonderfully baked cranberry orange bread, ginger bread cookies and pastries.

As for now, I am BEAT! A good beat.

A blessed beyond belief beat.

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