This is my attempt to basically journal about this weekend when I visited Church of the Hills in Austin. April 17, I was so excited ~ and arrived at the church with my friends, Athena and Debbie. We had a wonderful sweet worship time lead by Kim Walker Smith and her husband, Skyler. As the songs went on, a sound from overhead became louder and louder & I asked Athena, “is that the vent system?!” She repied, “no, I think it’s rain!” And it was. A storm was rolling by. About between song 3 & 4, the rain was so loud, especially in contrast to the quieting music as they transitioned. And then…a huge thunder roared and many people clapped and cheered at what seemed so appropriately displayed, the splendor of God amidst the praises of his people!
After walking though the fire-line (which is just a fancy name for two lines formed by spirit-filled ministry team members, who pray for you with outreached arms, imparting virtues, fruits of the Spirit, aspects of the character of God and of heaven, etc. as you walk between them), I felt peaceful. Then I went up for individual prayer by one person toward the alter. Sue Farmer prayed for my request that a root of self-promotion(something I’ve been feeling convicted about) to be taken out of me – that I would be able to move in my gifts without thinking of myself or trying to somehow promote myself. I want this selfish thinking DONE with so I can focus only on the Lord. Sue was comforting and reminded me that I am human and we humans are selfish by nature…even Kim Walker had a season of several years when she didn’t sing a word on a stage before she understood the importance of living this true worship, out.
The other thing I asked her to pray about was our upcoming move to OR. Instead of any anxiety, peace. Instead of worry, provision (and peace!). And she added something that brought so much comfort to me. She held my hands in hers and with love, looked at me, called me by name, and said she felt the Lord saying to her that I do NOT need to feel guilty for anything regarding this move. Only to feel His love and accept that it is unconditional. She then said that I have not failed here, and it should not be considered a step back to return to Oregon. But rather, a step forward. The Lord told her there will be “new beginnings for us there”.
It was exactly the confirmation I needed, at exactly the right time. I cried at the goodness of a living God who cares so much for me that He would communicate his heart with perfect timing and love and grace.
I went back for the last day the Bethel team was in town, this morning, and took my lil family with me. After another sweet worship svc. & a wonderful and touching (& media-rich) message from Sheri Silk mainly for the fathers in the house, I saw Kim Walker two rows in front of me and waited until someone finished getting their photo taken with her, to approach her. I asked if she would pray for me, personally, regarding worship leading in my future. She smiled and put her hand on me and prayed. She declared “breakthrough” over me in this area (and at the sound of that word, I began to cry; I’ve always taken a special liking to referring to God as the God of break through) & imparted wisdom and love. She asked the Lord to help me to make time with him a priority so that we can grow together in intimacy. I knew He was listening.
That was about it! We left in so much peace and unity, gathered our children and went out to a Chinese buffet for lunch. It was a great weekend…since Thursday, when I was able to spend some quality time w/God, alone in a dark room…and received 4 or 5 different scriptures that spoke RIGHT to me, regarding our upcoming move. Such memorable moments with my Maker. I am so humbled that He loves me that much.
Keep workin’ out all things together for my good, keep speakin’ to me LORD, I’m-a-listenin’!