lyrics to a new song: Express it Confess it Embrace

this song just reflects how i feel about people increasingly growing inward – i guess growing isn’t the right word. we’re regressing to become more introverted & more self-reliant. sometimes i wish i could push a time machine button & swooosh -we’re all back to the 50’s like in ‘the truman show’ when there were no garage door openers…no self-check-outs…no email or texting or atm’s. it’s like the goal these days is to decrease human interaction as much as possible. i dont know bout you, but that makes me sad. so i wrote a song about it – wanna hear it, hear it goes:

express it confess it embrace

by, Chelan Rene’ Russ

l see you’re holdin’

quite the load

can i walk beside you

down this dusty road

see, i know you’ve got a story

ya know it…never hurt – no one to talk

but it seems like society…keeps takin’ a step back from unity. we replace a

face w/another machine & we praise advancement of technology

what would happen if we did life face to face?

express it, confess it, embrace

make the time to touch…take a chance and feel

express it, confess it, embrace

you – gotta want to

sacrifice

free up a hand to

serve a brother; realize

how love is the best investment

you don’t always bank on a return

(prechorus/ chorus)

(dont ya think our… lives would change if… {repeat chorus})

go on, express it, confess it, embrace

adlib:
go on a walk, party on your block, send a letter in the mail, bbq
volunteer, spread the cheer, raise
a hand tell ’em what you’re goin’ through
express it, confess it, embrace

Express it, Confess it, Embrace – a song about community / reaching out

I see you’re holdin’ quite the load

Can I walk beside you down this dusty road

See I know you’ve got a story

You know it never hurt no one to talk

 

Bridge:

But it seems like society

Keeps takin’ a step back from unity

We replace a face with another machine

And we praise advancement of technology

Chorus:

What would happen if we did life

Face to face

Express it, Confess it, Embrace

Take the time to touch

Take a chance and feel

Express it, Confess it, Embrace


You’ve gotta wanna sacrifice

Free up a hand o serve a brotha; realize

How love is the best investment

When you don’t always bank on a return

.

Bridge

Chorus

.

(Adlibs: Tell a cashier,”God loves you.”, send a letter in the mail, have a BBQ

Volunteer, spread some cheer, raise a hand & tell ’em what you’re goin’ thru)

Express it, Confess it, Embrace (x3 or 4)

humble pie

there’s a guy whose blog i visit weekly cause he writes often…about stuff that matters. in his own words:

A bit about me in a nice bulleted list for easy reading

• Husband and father of two
• Disgusted with America not being America anymore
• Fed up with Christianity not being Christianity anymore
• Tired of seeker sensitive as well as the emerging church and its leadership
• Grossed out by church politics and their business-like approach
• Sickened by liberal, hippie, hipster – “Christians” that abuse God’s grace
• Living in the beautiful Pacific Northwest.
• An architect by trade and education waiting to do what I am meant to do
• Formally a licensed minister serving in a Pastor of Worship capacity
• Constantly searching for truth and not sugar coated, happy-go-lucky, Bible chats and story time.
• I love food (too much) sports, and many nerdy hobbies.

In http://www.dadreformed.com you will see random articles containing my rants on the topics above as well personal entries…

well, thought i’d send you over to a post of his about humbling ourselves, cause i think we all need a good kick in the butt reminder of this every so often…or every day.

yesterday i did something embarrassingly irresponsible. i had to fight – spiritually – to keep shame from overwhelming me. – to keep from lying about it – to keep from supressing it all. it was something that could have happened and probably happens to moms all the time, but to me? i know i have too much pride in the way i mother…& just…the way i do things.

but last night, God gave me the courage to confess (to my friend/husband). all the sudden, my tears would not stop! but they weren’t flowing from shame so much as self-realization and release. i knew that without confession & the humility therein, i’d be held captive in my spirit by shame. shame speaks my enemy’s native tongue as it suffocates my mind… unless i see it for what it is and speak out against it. it’s really hard to do. but it’s freeing to express it. confess it. & embrace.

how ’bout instead of pumpkin, let’s have a piece of humble pie today?

http://dadreformed.com/2008/11/13/humbling-ouselves

a scripture & more

isaiah 65…and me

1“I was ready to respond, but no one asked for help.

i didn’t ask because i had too much pride to. i thought i could handle my bad habits and secret sins and stressful days without any help, from anyone. or i was too ashamed to talk to you about it.

I said, ‘Here I am, here I am!’ to a nation that did not call on my name.

I was ready to be found, but no one was looking for me.

i know. you could’ve delivered me. but i was too busy. too wrapped up in my own selfish wants. instead of you, i looked for other things to sustain & calm me, even for a minute ~ a hershey bar, a latte’, a “comment”, sex, a new purse, an insanely good musician, my own family, gossip…

2 All day long I opened my arms to a rebellious people.

i know. my Bible next to the couch laid open with promises and grace and truth to find again. to rediscover. it was right by my son’s pirate treasure box. that was fitting. i remember the prodigal son. such a powerful image of open arms.

your spirit whispers in my ear all the time.

3 All day long they insult me to my face by worshiping idols…

i look in the mirror & i think i actually make self image & body image my idol. as well as public opinion. some days, the computer or movies can willingly & easily take your rightful place

5 Yet they say to each other,
‘Don’t come too close or you will defile me!
I am holier than you!’

like sunday morning in church when i thought that black usher was looking me up & down, but he was probably just looking to see if i needed a Bible or bulletin. i don’t want people that aren’t like me to invade my personal space. at times i think i’m somehow holier, without a word exchanged.

“holier”. if i drift from reality, i can actually convince myself that my good deeds & gifts to charity are worth holy-points to you, kept on a celestial dry erase board

These people are a stench in my nostrils,
an acrid smell that never goes away.

forgive me. please forgive me. you are my first love. your worth to me is greater than any of these things. i do need your help to react to everyday life, even the good days.

i see you. i call on your name. i run into your arms. i want my life to be an offering, one of a sweet smell that never goes away. i love you.

shoplift a heavy burden

it was a rush. my mind would go a hundred miles an hour (to keep up with my heart) as i walked the isles of the store. it could be any store…or house. it could be any thing. lipstick, underwear, a toy for my son, a ring, a birthday gift, a grape, a coke…you get the idea. my objective was to try & find a way to get out of that store without paying for it…without a soul noticing it was gone. it was kind of a ‘lets see how far i can push the limits’ game i played. the anxiety was actually exciting while i shopped. maybe since i never really went thru a drinkin’ & druggin’ phase, this was my version of a “high” i missed out on. the pinnacle was always at checkout. i thought if i got past checkout, i’d probably be safe…beyond suspicion. sometimes i’d use coy conversation & flattery to distract the cashier. i was dang good.

rolling cameras, electronic machines, magnetic strips, return policies ~ i thought i could beat them all. for example, if i got hungry, i’d head over to the protein bar section, open one up, eat it slowly while i ‘shopped’, as to not seem paranoid & then leave the wrapper on the bottom of the cart at check out. if they asked, i’d say, ‘oh, that’s just garbage’. a thief and a liar.

sometimes i’d be at home, bored w/an overdrawn bank account & have an intense desire to shop…or should i say, attain something new. once the urge got in my brain, it was like nothin’ could stop me. i’d take little items easy to hide in my purse. if i didn’t have the money (i read shoplifting rarely has to do with the lack of money), i’d think, ‘there’s got to be somethin’ around the house i can return. then w/that cash or credit, i can buy something else.’ i’d frantically search the house for items or search my purse for a good receipt & then look for an item listed on it. in essence, i used the socially acceptable & legal right to return things, so as to justify it. i’d take back all kinds of things i’d had for up to 9 months, clothes worn & washed countless times…i’d literally break things, un-stitch a hem to make it seem defective, even hot-glue a plastic price-tag loop back onto a garment so it looked never worn.

one time i even returned a dress jacket i gave to my husband for his birthday. it had a small rip in the armpit & i made it bigger, stating it was defective. originally i paid $29. @ fred meyer…& i got credit for it, but not before several cashiers looked at it with an ‘oh my god.’ examining me & then the botched receipt (another trick i was fond of ~ i’d make the purchase date illegible w/water stains or just just rip it). they had a small debate team meeting as i stood there with a long line of people behind me. yeah, it was embarrassing. am i really writing all this? my gosh, it still is. but at the time, all that was worth a $13. gift card to me so i could get something new. to this day i can’t believe it ‘worked’. in fact, to this day, i can’t believe i was never caught.

i watched a dr. phil called, ‘can’t stop stealing’. i completely related to this woman. only she’d been arrested 4 or 5 times & was still addicted. he basically used her kids’ innocence & the threat of prison to scare & shame her into accepting the gift of cognitive therapy he offered to pay for “in her own home town”.

it was far from a message of grace & forgiveness. now that’s a real gift.

i thought getting caught just one time would break me. the sheer humiliation of being hauled off in from of my toddler while he waits for his daddy to come for him…or the thought of being handcuffed in public…it still scares me. but that’s not what helped me stop. dr. phil’s guest made me feel less alone in my addiction, but that wasn’t it either.

i read that confessing something to God with your mouth – it cleanses & saves you. confessing it to someone close you can trust is what starts the healing process. i believed that. i finally told my husband last year, then later my mom, that i had struggled with this compulsion for several years. like food addicts who have to eat to live & are therefore continually faced w/temptation to overeat as they stand in front of their fridge, i had to shop for necessities & groceries weekly. the temptation was always there.

but after confessing to God & someone who could hold me immediately accountable, my urges to “lift” started…lifting. when i’m tempted to steal (yeah, i’m still tempted), i ask myself, ‘self, why!?! do u need that? what kind of example are u setting? would it be worth getting caught? do u think you’re more special or entitled than others who actually pay? get over your…self.’ or i’ll just say a simple prayer for the strength i need; recalling that there’s One who promises to supply all my needs, when i need them. sometimes i don’t do either, & end up taking something anyway. the last thing i can remember lifting was a birthday card that played ‘who let the dogs out’ when you opened it. angel had used it as entertainment while @ wal mart, even during self-check out. that was 3 or 4 months ago.

i’ve been thinkin’ about it lately. my reasons for doin’ it & for me, it comes down to three things ~ not trusting God nearly enough, refusing to die to my selfish desires, & clutching a perverted sense of self-entitlement.

today as i type this, i am nearly free of that issue. not because i tried hard, faithfully attended a 12-step klepto program, or was caught in the act. instead, thank God grace was poured out on me.

before it got worse, i was shown in my heart how confession & reliance {on strength greater than my own} can join forces to really change a person ~ from the inside out.