A Prayer for Today, and for our Future

This is something I wrote this morning while I was supposed to me paying attention to the teacher @ church…but he kept saying things that made me think…and then I just started writing…

Spirit of the living God

Apprehend me

I’m calling out to you, gurgling my request

From this thick pool of pride

About to submerge me.


Sweet Spirit of the living God,

Apprehend me!

Whip me around, get down on my level

Look in my eyes and speak with the fullness

Of your strength and subtlety.


Touch me inside

With your discerning love.

Point me in the way of my destiny,

Designed by your Word from before time began.


Impart your power that changes my life

That changes a life…that changes a life

That changes a church

That changes a city

That brings back a NATION to its founding truths!

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The Refocus of a Blog

lack-focus

Ya know, I figure since I got this new, easy zoomed-in domain, it’s about that time to get my writing more focused. I don’t know why, but to me, it seems scattered (pretty characteristic of my self-diagnosed A.D.D. behavior).  But I don’t feel the need to branch out and cover a wide range of topics or to say my piece about politics or the latest headline. I don’t get a lot of traffic (and maybe that’s why), but I am so glad that God has helped me MUCHLY with not being concerned w/”how many & who” visits this lil corner. For me, I’ve found that that way of thinking can get dangerous and lead to…as silly as it may sound…an addiction to social media technolofame (did I just coin that Continue reading

humble pie

there’s a guy whose blog i visit weekly cause he writes often…about stuff that matters. in his own words:

A bit about me in a nice bulleted list for easy reading

• Husband and father of two
• Disgusted with America not being America anymore
• Fed up with Christianity not being Christianity anymore
• Tired of seeker sensitive as well as the emerging church and its leadership
• Grossed out by church politics and their business-like approach
• Sickened by liberal, hippie, hipster – “Christians” that abuse God’s grace
• Living in the beautiful Pacific Northwest.
• An architect by trade and education waiting to do what I am meant to do
• Formally a licensed minister serving in a Pastor of Worship capacity
• Constantly searching for truth and not sugar coated, happy-go-lucky, Bible chats and story time.
• I love food (too much) sports, and many nerdy hobbies.

In http://www.dadreformed.com you will see random articles containing my rants on the topics above as well personal entries…

well, thought i’d send you over to a post of his about humbling ourselves, cause i think we all need a good kick in the butt reminder of this every so often…or every day.

yesterday i did something embarrassingly irresponsible. i had to fight – spiritually – to keep shame from overwhelming me. – to keep from lying about it – to keep from supressing it all. it was something that could have happened and probably happens to moms all the time, but to me? i know i have too much pride in the way i mother…& just…the way i do things.

but last night, God gave me the courage to confess (to my friend/husband). all the sudden, my tears would not stop! but they weren’t flowing from shame so much as self-realization and release. i knew that without confession & the humility therein, i’d be held captive in my spirit by shame. shame speaks my enemy’s native tongue as it suffocates my mind… unless i see it for what it is and speak out against it. it’s really hard to do. but it’s freeing to express it. confess it. & embrace.

how ’bout instead of pumpkin, let’s have a piece of humble pie today?

http://dadreformed.com/2008/11/13/humbling-ouselves

shoes off, pt.2

in ancient times, people took their shoes off as a display of humility or selflessness.

pastor allen rigg of calvary austin spoke about this in a massage like 9 months ago, & it really stuck. he gave many examples, but i have a few of my own:

 “shoes-off”:

  • you’re running late, but you let another driver in front of you
  • you go out of your way to spend your last $3. at starbucks – for a tired friend
  • you say you’re sorry and actually ask for forgiveness

 “shoes-on”:

  • you write in a comment card at a restaurant, to tell managers about your crappy service (for the waiter’s own good, of course)
  • you disregard your commitment to your family so you can feel the fleeting confidence boost from flirting with a coworker
  • you find a way to revolve most conversations around you and your interests

***~~~~~~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~~~~~

remove the shoes. remove the barrier. remove all pretences. relax. it’s a way of saying you can be who you  are in front of someone…toss the film & filth aside, say in a humble way, “here they are-  my nasty, calloused, rancid smellin’ feet!” or better yet, “could you rinse off, disinfect,  soften the hardest, dirtiest parts of me… separate me from the silt & sludge of this  world”.  ok, guess that means i’ve come full circle, back to reason 1 – getting  clean. 

Jesus washed his disciples’ feet, so, each one had to take his shoes off first, right? he even scrubbed & wiped the sweaty grime from the feet of the man who he knew would commit treason against him that very day, resulting in his brutal murder.

it’s been embarrassing, even downright shameful for me to be barefoot (literally and symbolically), but that’s ok. taking that step can mean letting go of the crud, but at the same time embracing how i was made – i’m his disciple too, reluctantly letting even Jesus serve me & wash me clean.

~ how does one do that? ~

~ what’s something you’ve done this week that was “shoes-on” ~

well, c’mon, let me hear ya!

fathers, sons, love & forgiveness

wait! this one’s a long post, but it’s a good thinker, hang with me here!!

But when the right time came, God sent his Son, born of a woman, subject to the law. God sent him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that he could adopt us as his very own children. And because we are his children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, “Abba, Father.” Now you are no longer a slave but God’s own child. And since you are his child, God has made you his heir. – Gal 4:4-7 (NLT)

i love how God sent his Son to earth, spoke to him as his Son, & treated him as a Son should be treated. now we have the awesome privilege of making that comparison with our own children. we can see so much more clearly how to parent our own, and even more importantly, how to view ourselves as the precious, priceless children of God we are. when we hurt ourselves, are hit w/sickness or feel pain by another (in any way), he is immediately there to pick us up, squirt some bactine, give us a bandage & a hug if we will dare to reach for him. ok, not literally, but at least thru the body of Christ if you’re plugged in somewhere & absolutely thru His Word. but so often when a natural father disappoints, we attribute those failures and faults to our heavenly Father. why?!?! i guess doubt creeps in…squelching our faith in any kind of father figure. with every shattered hope, from sexual abuse to never receiving a hug; from an unfulfilled promise of a phone call to a no-show during the birth of your daughter, comes an opportunity to do one of two things. either

a.) build walls of protection to no longer “feel” hurt (which like denial, never really works) or

b.) dare to reach with faith as a child in a desperate state, for our Father in heaven.

hmmm…case in point ~ it’s 2:18am & my daughter, who’s fighting a fever & goopy droopy eyes just woke up crying. it was only natural for me to get up at the sound of her cry and go to her, give her medicine, pray & rock her in my arms. i wonder…how much more does our own Creator & Saviour long for that closeness every time we cry.

i’m learning (from books by john bevere & also nancy missler), that a danger in building protective walls is while they seem to keep hurt out, they also keep love in. in order to love as God does, unconditionally, we h a v e to make ourselves vulnerable. if we hold anything against them, we for our own growth need to say to our earthly father figures (if only in our minds), ‘you may have wounded me. it’s not okay, but i will still love you, because now that i am a child of God, i aim to love as he loves. completely opposite of natural love…it is this new agape love. the kind that is not selfish. expects nothing in return. gives until there is nothing left to give…& wants to then give more. nothing you can do can weaken…or strengthen it.’

it’s really hard for me to understand this love. the more i think about it, the more i want to crouch in a corner & hide. it seems like just about everything i do has some kind of ulterior, self-seeking motive. i used to hate the phrase ‘oh, get over it’, but it’s starting to become my friend these days. i so don’t want to be that easily offended person people talk about & tip toe around.

because we let the sins of an earthly father figure offend us to the point of resentment, trust seeps out the cracks & our love grows increasingly hard. as the Bible puts it: “and because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.” (matt. 24:12 KJV) what an image this scripture conveys! like candle wax when the flame is snuffed out, the surrounding air within minutes begins to harden it. we are surrounded by iniquity like air. but this says to me that only when i choose to overlook an offense, will my love remain soft, vulnerable, and of God.

He is that burning light that feeds my love for others, every day. i wish i could love, serve, speak, parent more like him…but i’m so glad that he sees my progress thus far, and accepts me as i am.

praise you, God.

“Instinctively we try to be like our God, and if He is conceived to be stern and exacting, so will we ourselves be. The truth is that God is the most winsome of all beings and His service one of unspeakable pleasure.

The fellowship of God is delightful beyond all telling. He communes with His redeemed ones in an easy, uninhibited fellowship that is restful and healing to the soul.

He remembers our frame and knows that we are dust. He may sometimes chasten us, it is true, but even this He does with a smile, the proud, tender smile of a Father who is bursting with pleasure over an imperfect but promising son who is coming every day to look more and more like the One whose child he is.”

– A.W. Tozer (1897-1963) from The Root of the Righteous.